Stop Being Realistic and Start Being Possibilitarian

We often forget that being truly free isn’t just about having the ability to move, to travel, or to do whatever we please when we please. It’s about having freedom of thought. To be free in your mind means to be free to think, to feel, and to express yourself without judgement or restriction. It’s about the courage to express yourself and your opinion without fear of retribution or criticism.

When we stop being fearful or concerned about what others will think of us, our minds become truly free. We can then discover what we truly feel, think, and believe. We can experience moments of true joy and contentment.

It’s easy to become trapped in fear, worry, and judgement. We can become so concerned about how we will be perceived or judged that we forget to be true to ourselves. We can become so wrapped up in our own thoughts that we forget to listen to and appreciate the thoughts of others.

To be truly free in your mind requires a strong sense of self-love and self-acceptance. We must be able to accept ourselves, our thoughts, and our opinions no matter what anyone else may think. We must be willing to take risks and explore new ideas, even if we may think that we’ll be judged or rejected. We must be willing to make mistakes and learn from them.

Being truly free in your mind is a journey. It’s a journey of self-discovery, of learning to trust yourself, and of learning to accept yourself. It’s a journey of understanding that it’s ok to be different and to have different ideas from those around you. It’s a journey of being able to be content with who we are and what we believe, no matter what anyone else may think.

When we give ourselves permission to be truly free in our minds, we can experience a sense of joy and freedom that we never knew was possible. We can explore our thoughts and feelings, feel connected to others, and make decisions based on our own values and beliefs. We can experience a sense of peace and contentment that comes from knowing that we are in control of our own lives.

"Everything you can imagine is real." — Picasso

Self proclaimed realists tout their ability to foresee the future, as it is them who know what's possible and what's not. If we were to look at reality with these eyes, we'd be going nowhere as a species. By being realistic, you are not taking risks that could bring potentially great rewards. And when you are realistic, you are more likely to stick with the status quo and don't explore new ideas that could lead to unexpected successes.

Extrapolating your own possibilities into the future by looking at the status quo, is like the little elephant that's tied to a stick. He learned that he can't escape when he was little and so he's not even trying when he's big enough to pull that little stick out of the ground. The only constant in life is change and why then limit yourself to what you think is possible? Why not dream big and let life surprise you?

Limiting yourself with your thinking is as much of an attachment to expectation as tying your happiness to hope. It's the non-attachment to the outcome that is key. Neuroscience is telling us that by having high hopes that are not being realised, you are experiencing a huge drop in Dopamine. At the same time random rewards and unexpected positive outcomes are increasing your Dopamine far more than expected rewards. This alone is reason enough for me to adopt a possibility mindset over a fixed mindset. I get the rewards of both, the positivity of pondering about the future and the Dopamine increase from unexpected outcomes.

In psychology this kind of rigid thinking is deemed a cognitive distortion that can lead to depressive symptoms, such as rumination, negative self-talk, and feelings of hopelessness. When people engage in rigid thinking, they tend to see the world as black and white, and adopt a "right vs. wrong" mentality. This type of thinking can lead to feelings of despair and powerlessness, as well as difficulty accepting mistakes or failure. Additionally, rigid thinking can lead to difficulty solving problems, as well as impaired social functioning, both of which can contribute to the onset of depression.

If you don't switch your mind to freedom and non-attachment to the outcome, you start fighting this life and limit your possibilities. Things always work out, when you marvel at this world like a child, because you have no fixed expectation of how reality should form. The moment we grow up, is the moment most of us stop marveling at the world. This is the moment we become unfree. And in the end, most of our knowledge and our opinions are not original. It's something we adopt from our environment. The only truth we can find is the truth we find in ourselves, when we're quieting your mind.

If the above text is triggering you, because you are a realist, know this: Don't fall prey to the dogma of your adopted mindset. Instead use the feeling of being triggered as a prompt to stay open and see what's coming up for you. It's never about the topic itself...

Have a great start into the week!

Much love, peace of mind and openness - Jan

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